Kollektivet: Sigbjørn - Episode 6 - Internet Sweetheart

Recap: In this episode we see what happens when Sigbjørn tries internet-dating.

                       (at school)
Teacher:
"Part 2 of the exam will be on the topic of Reproductive Physiology, which I assume you’ve all learned by now."
"Remember that the papers are due tomorrow, OK you guys? Before the end of term."

               (at Petter’s house)
Sigbjørn: "What do you mean, I’m not so popular                     with the ladies?"




Petter: "Well, I’m just saying; It hasn’t really been raining vagina the last few years, to be quite frank."
Sigbjørn: "Oh, No? Yes it has."


Petter: "And how many women have you slept with the last month?"
Sigbjørn: "O-ho-ho, let me just get a minute the get my numbers straight:                       
                A HOUNDRED AND TWO!"
Petter: "102 in one month?"
Sigbjørn: "Give or take a week…"
Petter: "You know what, Sigbjørn? We need to get you into the dating-game."
              "Let’s make you a profile on “Sugar”."
Sigbjørn: "No, no! We are going to do no such thing!"
Petter: "Yes, yes we are."
Sigbjørn: "No, I am not…."
Petter: "Just lie down."
Sigbjørn: "Make your ow damn profile!"
Petter: "Just relax, let’s see, “Likes walks in the forest”."
Sigbjørn: "No, Petter, don’t write that, you know I’m horrendously allergic to crowberries."
Petter: "And now for the profile-pic. Sit! Sit! If you just stay like this; 3,2,1" snap       
             "Look at that! A masterpiece! You look like a God my friend!"
Sigbjørn: "I’m going to delete it the minute I come home."
Petter: "It’s still a masterpiece."
                                                          (at home)
 You have a message from HotBella. --> Answer HotBella?
Mother: "Are you studying for your exam now, Sigbjørn?"
Sigbjørn: "Yes."
Mother: "That teacher of yours, seems like he’s really strict."
Sigbjørn: "Yes that he is. Really strict. It would never occur to me to do anything but study.
                A lot of studying going on here, now, yes."
                                                           (at school)
Teacher: Sigbjørn! I am sick and tired of you hammering away at that computer!
Sigbjørn: "I am so sorry Mr.Vincent, I’m just chatting with my internet-girlfriend."
              "It’s a real internet-girlfriend, and I have real internet-sex with her too!"
Teacher: "That will not be taking place on school grounds!"
Sigbjørn: "No."
Teacher: "Just make plans to write after school is out, OK?"
Sigbjørn: "Mhm."
 To HotBella: Wanna’ meet?
                                                     (at home)
Mother: "Where are you going?"
Sigbjørn: "Just going to hang out with Jeppe."
Mother: "OK, have a good time."
Sigbjørn: "Won't be coming home, I’m staying over at Jeppe’s."
                                                    (in car)
Teacher: laughs "How many times didn’t I tell you to put away that bloody computer?" laughs